We are just about ready to wrap up our school year. As soon as the weather acts remotely like summer, there is nothing I can do to keep the kids focused on school work any longer and the year abruptly comes to an end. In their younger years, this is perfectly okay. There is plenty to learn outdoors too. For instance, does a sleeping bag make for a good slip-n-slide? How many people is too many people on a bicycle? Will this giant magnifying glass start a fire? Or how many times in a day can we ask Mom if the snake can be an indoor pet before she locks all the doors on us?
As a tribute to our school year, I thought I’d entertain you with a list of ways in which you could easily spot a homeschool family. I know there are plenty of spins on this out on social media, but this one is custom-made for you by the Allan family. We did the work, so you didn’t have to. You’re welcome!
How to Identify a Homeschooler in the Wild:
They have the first 23 digits of pi memorized. For fun.
They absentmindedly work a lock to see if they can come up with the combo that they have a 1 in 1000 chance of undoing while listening to “The Lord of the Rings.” Since the books are so long, they succeed.
They “swim” in the wheelbarrow on unusually hot, spring days.
“Why is there pumice in the sofa?!” is a valid question.
They almost never do their school work at a desk.
They build teepees in the woods.
They do whatever this is:
They all know how to solve a Rubik’s cube.
They sit like this as if it’s totally normal.
They play multiple instruments.
They have been reading 500-page books from the time they were six years old.
They’re extremely confident in their hairstyles.
They’re not afraid to protest.
The homeschool mom is never surprised to see her child’s artwork everywhere.
They’re excited to identify a new bird at the feeder.
Even in their distress, they are still precocious, as this example shows: “Remind me not to do English before science. I just wrote ‘significant’ with an apostrophe between the ‘n’ and ‘t’,” Ellie told me. “Signifi-can’t…sigh…”
They run their own choir class.
They work at Chick-fil-A.
There is no such thing as an age limit; they do everything together.
The homeschooling mom is always there to witness their ‘firsts’. The first time they understand a math concept, the first time they successfully complete something on their own, the first time they learn what a word means: “Metabolism; it sounds like some kind of religion,” remarked Caleb.
The mom is never alone.
After complaining about this fact to another homeschooling mom for about three seconds, they realize they wouldn’t have it any other way. Though when the kids are playing outside, they may still lock the doors every once in awhile.
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